All You Need Is Love

I have noticed a disturbing trend among younger married couples. They are calling it quits at an alarming rate. Even more disturbing is the minimal effort they seem to exert toward saving their relationships.

I am clearly THE person to address this situation having served as a bridesmaid countless painful times. One particular service gave me the opportunity to meet a member of the clergy who instructed the wedding party in our roles not just for that day but for the couple's entire marriage. He reminded us of the couple's love for us thus our selection as participants in this very important day. He tolerated our youthful inappropriate pranks during the rehearsal then very calmly yet persuasively revealed the truth about the upcoming marriage. He said that all relationships have obstacles and unexpected hurdles to overcome and that we could help this couple to triumph time and time again over those challenges. He delivered the responsibility as mandatory eliminating any ideas about possibly running from this life-long connection.

I often wonder how I could display this particular couple as an example for the engaged or newly wed. They recently celebrated their 30th wedding anniversary and are happily married and professionally successful and they have two amazing beautiful daughters. They have remained close friends with the wedding party in addition to maintaining and nurturing their love for each other. All relationships take work. Friendships, marriages and even pen pals take love and attention from both sides.

To you very young and easily defeated young couples, I encourage you to work together to save that love. And turn to those whom you trust and you know will help you fight for your relationships. It is worth fighting for or I doubt you would have trotted down the aisle sporting that expensive gown and tuxedo and watching your parents' bank accounts dissolve into finger sandwiches.

It is not about the wedding. It is about the marriage. It is about your love. Look at your photographs and remember why you both said vows. And chin up! Good luck! The point is that you have loved ones cheering for you! No pain, no gain. No guts, no glory. Keep your sense of humor.

And to Susan and Bill, Congratulations on your 30th anniversary. Well done my friends.